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On or about January 2nd, 2008, I followed your advice and applied the above button to my forehead using the included fastener [please reference gallery 2:1c]. By following your explicit directions, I have incurred significant injury to my forehead, sustained significant trauma to my skull and surrounding connective tissue, and have suffered significant and irreversible psychological trauma that will affect my ability to earn a living and remain a functioning member of society. In that I am not a litigious person, I have asked my counsel to offer you an out of court settlement in the amount of $850,000. If said settlement is not received by February 1, 2008 I regret to inform you that I will take all necessary legal actions to remedy this wrong done to me by your dangerous disregard of my safety.
Please address all future correspondence to the law firm of Dewey, Cheatem, & Howe.
Thank You for Your Time,
Howie Feltersnach