The 2008 Halfies: Why Do You Hate Nintendo? Awards
Written by Jim Squires   
Thursday, 10 July 2008 01:00

Yet Another White Plastic Peripheral Award

And the winner is... Mario Kart Wii Steering Wheel

Nunchuk? Of course! Classic Controller? Got one. Zapper? Ughh. Yes. So when it came time to pick up Mario Kart, did I really need a steering wheel? Turns out I needed two. Wii peripherals have been both hit and miss - this one was definitely a hit.

The Nintendo Award For Manufactured Shortages

And the winner is...Wii Fit

It's been nearly three years and some people are still having problems finding a Wii console. Guitar Hero had it's share of "hard to find" areas on the Wii too. But WiiFit? Supposedly we were sent a smaller amount because of the US dollar. Go figure.

Epic FAIL Award

And the winner is... Super Smash Bros. Brawl online play

They may have introduced other changes, but nothing could stop online from being SSBB's most anticipated feature. Too bad failed connections could make a single match take an hour to get underway. Kinda reminiscent of the DOA4 lag debacle.

Epic SUCCESS Award

And the winner is... Mario Kart Wii online play

While everyone else embraced the online age, Nintendo was drug into it kicking and screaming. After the disaster that was SSBB no one expected Mario Kart Wii's online to work, so when it did we couldn't have been happier. Let's see if they can repeat it.

Eat Shit and Die Award for Rampant Fanboyism

And the winner is... Our SSBB Review

Some people are just assholes -- those people are called Nintendo fans. Don't believe me? Check out the comments on our SSBB review. Had we given it a numerical score it would have been a high 7. Sorry we had an opinion, we'll try not to next time.

Don't Forget Where You Came From Award

And the winner is... Mega Man 9

The Mega Man franchise has had it's ups and downs in recent years, and that's putting it nicely. That's why it was such a delightful surprise when Capcom announced it was doing a WiiWare title in the classic NES style. Jump and shoot time, bitches!

We Can Be Greedy With Our DLC Too! Award

And the winner is... Final Fantasy: My Life as a King

Thought only Microsoft and Sony consoles know how to roll out the greedy DLC? Final Fantasy: MLAAK has only been out two months and has already had more than half a dozen pieces of content. Ching ching bling bling, Square-Enix.

Up next? Find out what games everyone should be playing!


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Comments (10)Add Comment
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written by Xerxes3rd, July 10, 2008
I'd have to disagree about the Wii Wheel- it's not bad, but I wouldn't consider it good, either. Brawl online was pathetic, however. Mario Kart online was great, though I wish you could play non-team-based balloon battles, a la Mario Kart 64.
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written by Dan Zuccarelli, July 10, 2008
As far as my personal preference, I enjoyed the Wii Wheel more than any other white hunk of wii-plastic, but I doubt it's accurate enough for the harder levels (I kinda got bored before getting there, so I can say for sure).
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written by Xerxes3rd, July 10, 2008
Allow me to introduce the Nyko PerfectShot:

http://www.nyko.com/Nyko/Products/?i=124

The only complaints I have about it are that it's a tad top-heavy and the stock is a bit too wide. Aside from that, it's perfection. House of the Dead is a DREAM with this thing.
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written by Mookie, July 10, 2008
Ok, despite that these awards don't fully make sense (I hate Nintendo cause they succeeded at online with Mario Kart? I hate them cause they are putting Mega Man 9 on the system, even though this is Capcom's doing?) I would put my vote into the WiiWheel. Being a longtime Mario Kart fan, much about MKWii was disappointing, and this craptastic wheel just took the cake.
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written by Tralfaz, July 10, 2008
Welcome to the BBPS, home of the Nintendo-haters that don't actually hate Nintendo.

Also, bunch of misogynists, the whole lot of 'em.
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written by Dan Zuccarelli, July 10, 2008
Mookie:

The title of the awards stem from a very vocal minority that seem to think we just enjoy hating Nintendo. Which has never been the case. Though that still hasn't stopped the fanboys from screaming at us.

There's some things we hate about Nintendo, and some things we love. Some people might say that makes it a balanced opinion.... others like to focus on the negative.
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written by Kevin Alexander, July 10, 2008
Also, "Why do you hate Nintendo?" has become something of a mantra and definitely a go-to joke for those of us on the staff and some of our readers in the know.
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written by swiftwulf, July 10, 2008
Seriously, stop hating on Nintendo guys, you bunch of jerks!
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written by Mookie, July 11, 2008
Dan:

Thanks for clearing that up, I get it now.

And while I disagree with guys some of the time on Nintendo's doings I still find it all fair and honest criticisms.
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written by Dr. Cossack, July 12, 2008
Actually, Wii Wheel has been a bit hit for me. I skipped the last few days entries in the series which all looked boring to me, and jumped at the opportunity at being able to drive using a wheel. After doing it so much in Excitetruck, I wanted another game to enjoy, and Mario Kart Wii delivered. The online play is more than "just there": it WORKS, and it works great. The racing levels are pretty nice too.

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