Doing some research for my upcoming Dreamcast birthday party, I noticed something.  Sega is absolutely crazy!  You may have picked up on the insanity by their ridiculous add-ons for the Genesis, but their advertising has been consistently crazy.  The Genesis made a career out of very bluntly calling out Nintendo.  The Dreamcast, we were all told, was thinking.  Whether you love the company or not, you can't deny that these are the Top 10 WTF Sega Commercials there are (in no particular order.)  And trust me, it was hard to pick just ten.
Genesis Does!

No lie.  I know this commercial by heart.  I sing it regularly.  I once used the alpahbet magnets on my refrigarator to spell out Genesis Does.  It took balls to call out Nintendo by name, and it had Joe Montana, and Michael Jackson.



Sonic 2 Infomercial.

Who doesn’t love infomercials?  They are perhaps the greatest artform that Americans have given the world.  Americans invented infomercials, right?  This Sonic 2 spot is hysterical.

Blast Processing.

Once again Sega calls out Nintendo and shows that with “blast processing” your drag racer can go faster.  If you’re only playing SNES, good luck getting down the track.

Bring The Arcade Experience Home.

This gets on the list for 2 reasons.  First, the kid’s room full of arcade cabinets is my dream room.  Second, the way the announcer says “Why?  Check it out.”  He stays excited, but not too excited.

Japanese Mega CD.

How do you sell the Sega/Mega CD in Japan?  Easy.  Explosions, crazy rock star scientists, a quick shoutout to the specs, exploding Terminators.  I’m sold.

Game Gear.

Ethan Suplee has to hit himself in the head with a dead squirrel in order to enjoy his Gameboy.  Who are the ad wizards that came up with that one?

Introducing...Segata Sanshiro!

Segata Sanshiro was the Japanese mascot for the Saturn.  A fictional spoof of a classic judo film, Segata punished those who didn’t play Saturn with physical abuse.  The music rules.  There are explosions.  He is the Chuck Norris of the Sega Saturn.

The Master System Is Always There.

“Awesome!  Gotcha!”  This is soooo 80’s, and I’m pretty sure that kid was in Nickelodeon’s Hey Dude! Also, I love the futuristic explanations for everything.  8-bit console?  Nope.  Try Power Base with Control Pads and Light Phaser.  What’s up with emphasis on “there” at the end?  The challenge will always be where?  I’m confused.

Dreamcast:  The Movie

Maybe the Dreamcast would have lived longer if they saved the money from this huge action set piece and instead put a DVD player into the console.  Oh well.  Live and learn.  Or in Sega’s case, live, and don’t learn, and then die, and then just make software, and then ruin Sonic.

Segata Beats Kids.

Into sports?  Not on Segata’s watch!  He dishes out the most brutal ass kicking I’ve ever seen in a video game commercial, including choking out a minor and then leaves them to suffer in an alley.  YES!

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