Before we sit down and play GTA IV, which you just got from GameFly, it’s important to note that I have an extreme tendency towards murdering someone.

I know that this game is really fun and it has a lot of cool stuff you can do but you should really be aware that I have been wanting to know what it feels like to kill someone for a long time now. I’m not exactly sure what will push me over the edge so just be careful before you turn on that PS3

You’ve known me for a while now but I’ve never mentioned this tendency. You know that I love video games that let you shoot people but of course that doesn’t mean anything because tons of people like those types of games. But, just so you know, I’ve been looking at a lot of stuff on the net lately and the urge is probably at an all time high - just something to think about before you show me how to kill that hooker.

Also, one last thing - while I’ve made it clear that I have this urge, I haven’t said anything about the type of person I’ve been wanting to kill. I don’t want you get scared or anything but just know that my urge to kill someone isn’t really a respecter of person.

So, to recap, before you turn on that video game system and let me play this very violent game think of these three things:

1. I have an extreme tendency towards murdering someone.
2. The urge has been pretty high lately, almost as if to be on the edge.
3. While I have not decided on the type of person to kill, it seems as if anyone will satisfy my hunger.

Okay, let’s play!

ahem… Satire: n. - the use of irony, sarcasm, ridicule, or the like, in exposing, denouncing, or deriding vice, folly, etc. (i.e. it’s a joke)

ahem… Satire: n. - the use of irony, sarcasm, ridicule, or the like, in exposing, denouncing, or deriding vice, folly, etc. (i.e. it’s a joke)

ahem… Satire: n. - the use of irony, sarcasm, ridicule, or the like, in exposing, denouncing, or deriding vice, folly, etc. (i.e. it’s a joke)

Motor vehicle theft has been on the rise in America as many videogame players are stuck inside playing the newly released Grand Theft Auto IV (GTAIV) for the Xbox 360 and the PS3.

“I’ve been playing since [Tuesday] and so I haven’t had a chance to leave the house,” said Flim Rednose, a local retail manager. “So, today I went out to get some Wendy’s and realized that my car had been stolen.”

Police are blaming videogames, once again, for the rise in car thefts around the country. According to Cpt. Earl Mergot, a policeman in Newcastle, PA, car thieves have been stealing the cars of videogame players who are addicted to the non-linear gameplay of GTAIV. Players are inside while their cars are getting stolen outside.

“They need to freakin’ leave the house and do something with their lives. Meanwhile, crime is thriving in the streets, and these guys are inside playing videogames. It’s a shame.”

Rednose said he’s never had this problem before and he’s had plenty of videogame playing binges in his life.

“This is the first time where a game I’ve been playing for a while has actually crept into my real life. Oh, except for that time my Swift Palomino was stolen while I was playing WoW.”

ahem… Satire: n. - the use of irony, sarcasm, ridicule, or the like, in exposing, denouncing, or deriding vice, folly, etc. (i.e. it’s a joke)

Hey buds and budsettes, it’s your old pal The Rumor Hound (of Hell)! The last time you heard from me was at The Game Rag back in oh-seven. Well, The Game Rag has moved to the BBPS and you can damn sure be sure that I’m coming right along with them!! For those of you sleepies that have slept on The Game Rag and don’t know who I am, well, then WAKE UP!! I’m the number one rumorist on the video game scene and I’ll be bringing you the most rumorest information you’ve ever been informed of - like this little tidbit:

Sure, you know that the PS3 Home beta can already be accessed by using a proxy program and downloading it from Sony’s servers and that some people have even gotten it running, but, did you know that you don’t need to use that proxy program to access GameSpot? My top-of-the-line, top shelf, secret, underground, black clothes wearing sources tell me that they’ve used the PS3’s browser to hack into the internet and read news on gamespot.com. Pretty cool, huh?

Next up, there’s a possible rumor (it’s not a full-on rumor yet, I’m still poking the rumor flames) of a new game coming out for the Wii. I haven’t exactly gotten all the information yet, but be on the lookout for something here in the near future.

Also, I don’t want to forget to tell you this little morsel - there’s a chance that the creator of Mario (don’t want to give away his name!) is working on some new additions for his backyard garden. I don’t want to give out the full details, but there’s been some talk of tomatoes and cauliflower. Check back here for more info.

Lastly, you’ve been hearing a lot of rumors about a new Microsoft remote control that will look like the Wii’s remote and have the same functions. Well, I’ve got news for you people: 400 Children Released From Religious Compound. Also, don’t believe the hype about the controller. If I haven’t talked about it, then it probably isn’t rumor-worthy. Those other blogs are just trippin’.

Of course, take these rumors with a grain of salt - but you know that when the Rumor Hound is bringing it, he’s bringing it super salty!

PEACE OUT!

Here’s a look at the top selling video game software in Romania. The SNES is on top (once again) this week in sales. Super Smash Bros. smashed its way to the top the charts, just barely beating out the other games in the top three. Here’s the full list:

1. The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past (SNES) - 1,245 / NEW
2. Pit-Fighter (SNES) - 1,005 / 5,402
3. Lemmings (SNES) - 946 / 7,102
4. Wizards & Warriors III (NES) - 579 / 580
5. Desert Strike: Return to the Gulf (GEN) - 555 / 1,784
6. Castlevania III: Dracula’s Curse (NES) - 554 / 2,500,789
7. Joe & Mac (SNES) - 418 / 10,782
8. Tetris (GB) - 354 / 408,438
9. Super Adventure Island (SNES) - 301 / NEW
10. Ys III: Wanderers From Ys - 182 / 4,870